- If your child is openly defiant, it is because you openly threaten to do something but dont follow through
- If your child intentionally disturbs you, it is because you are not physically affectionate enough
- If your child does not respect other people’s feelings, it is because instead of speaking to your child, you order and command them
- If your child is not taught to confide in you about their mistakes, you have lost them
- If your child is too quick to anger, it is because you give too much attention to misbehavior and you give little attention to good behavior
- If your child takes things that do not belong to them, it is because when you buy them things, you don’t let them chose what they want.
- If your child is excerssively jealous, it is because you are only congratulate them when they successfully complete something and not when they improve at something even inf they don’t successfully complete it
- If your child is cowardly, it is because you help them too quickly.
- If your child does not stand up for themselves , it is because from a young age you have disciplined them regularly in public.
- If your chiild is secretive, it is because they don’t trust that you won’t blow things out of propotion.
- If your child had poor self-esteem, it is because you advice them more than you encourage them.
- If your child rebels it is because they know you care more about what others think than what is right
- If your child doesn’t listen to you but listens to others, it is because you are too quick to make decisions.
- If your child lies to you often, it is because you over-react too harshly to their inappropriate behavior.
- If your child talks back to you, it is because they watch you do it to others and think its normal behavior.
1) Indian Parents want there children to stand out in a crowd, but expect them to do what the crowd is doing
2) Politicians Divide us, Terrorists Unite us
3) Its ok to Piss in public, but it’s not ok to kiss in public
4) Every1’s in hurry, but no one reaches in time
5) Priyanka Chopra earned more money playing Mary Kom, than Mary Kom earned in her entire career.
6) Its dangerous to talk to strangers, but it’s perfectly ok to marry one
7) Most people who fight over Gita and Quran, have probably never read any of them
8) We rather spend more on our daughter’s wedding than on their education
9)The shoes we wear are sold in air Conditioned showrooms, the vegetables we eat are sold on the footpath
Value 1: Sensitivity
Divya came back from school and without even changing, she settled down next to her mother. With big tears floating in her lovely eye, she said, ‘I must have the latest Lady Bird cycle Mammas. All my friends have it, except me.” Aruna lovingly took her daughter close and tried to reason with her. “My dear, you already have one and it is not so old either, don’t you?” “yes, but ….”Divya tried to explain, but her tears just wouldn’t be stop. The little girl was quite dejected with her mother’s reaction to her demand for a cycle. She thought, “Mother is really mean. Am I asking for too much? It’s only a cycle.” That night, she fell asleep thinking about nothing else.
The next day was a Sunday. Aruna woke up Divya quite early and got her ready. She did not want to give Divya much time to think about what was going on. Nikhil, Divya’s father, was waiting for them in the car. The three enjoyed the ride and before long, they came to huge mansion. Within moments, a lovely lady?” Divya felt so shy, she hid behind her mother. Aruna greeted Mrs. Dilip with great warmth and affection.
Mrs. Dilip then took the three to a hall where there were about 50 children sitting in rows. Most of them were of around Divya’s age but some were as small as a year old. Two assistants were giving the children breakfast. Divya looked at her mother wondering where they had come. Aruna told her, “Divya, this is bal bhavan, an orphanage run by Mrs. Dilip. The children, you notice, are those whose parents either have abandoned them or have expired.” Divya couldn’t take her eyes off the children who were having their breakfast without a fuss. She remembered how she troubled her mother every morning at the breakfast table.
Later, Aruna and Divya walked around the orphanage. At the recreation room, Divya asked her mother, “Mamma, doesn’t each child own a toy?” just the question Aruna was waiting to hear! She said, “Divya, the children who live here are a little unfortunate. They are however lucky to be living in a place like the Bal bhavan. Sensitive and kind people like Mrs. Dilip are able to take care of their basic needs like food, clothing and shelter but orphanages usually do not have big funds for each child to own a toy.” Aruna continued, “We must learn to be thankful for whatever we have and moreover, be a little sensitive to the ones less fortunate than us by giving whatever little we can.”
A month went by. Divya’s class teacher called up Aruna and congratulated her on having raised such a sensitive and thoughtful child. Divya had spoken to her class about her trip to the Bal bhavan. All the children had collected almost three big cartons full of toys and storybooks to be gifted to their young friends at Bal bhavan. Aruna could not contain her tears and hugged her daughter when she came home.
Morel: Teach your children about how fortunate they are for what they have and develop sensitivity for other who are little unfortunate.
Starting from our birth they have taken care of our food (22 years * 365 days * 3 times = 24000 times!), household maintenance, our education (daily home works, uniform, school/tuition fee), religious moral teaching every day (THE REAL GREAT JOB), shelter, clothing, outings, vacations, toys, computer and God knows how many other countless efforts they have put in to make us a complete human being to enjoy and survive in this world. Indeed, all those efforts cannot be covered in this article but the overall emphasis is that its our moral and spiritual responsibility to take care of them now.
Below are some small acts of kindness which would truly show your affection to take good care of them:
- Give them enough money so that they don’t have to ask you.
- Share funny and entertaining things with them to make them laugh or smile.
- Don’t speak loudly. Speak slowly, nicely and softly.
- Do not walk in front of them in market or anywhere. They might walk slow being old; stay behind them. Give them respect.
- Ask for small tasks again and again. For example, “Abou Jee, do you need water? Should i bring tea for you? Are you hungry, baba” etc
- Closely monitor their health. visit doctor if required. Have them checked thoroughly time to time.
- Take care of their medicines. Set reminders on your phone for their medicines and serve them on time.
- Take them to the Temple. Walk slowly. Follow their pace.
- Take them to the park for walk. If not possible daily, then take them on weekend.
- Call them with respect.
- Open the door for them with respect.
- Adapt yourself according to their schedule not vise-versa.
- Do shopping for them (buy their clothes, shoes, small items like tooth paste). Buy your mother a nice coffee cup. Take them to market and buy them according to their likings. Buy your parents some nice books; usually people love to read books in old age.
- When you come back to home, visit them first in their room.
- Respect their social circle and let them enjoy with their friends.
- In case of conflict on any issue, try to follow them as much as possible. Remember, they have been sacrificing their money and time in raising you for years and years. Its time to pay back. They have been showing all the patience during your childhood. Its time for you to be patient.
- Keep them with you instead of sending them to old age home. This will be a big act of ignorance if you do.
- When starting the food, serve them first and on time
A last word. Let not parents expect all this care. And, children never forget any of their duties to their loved ones. I would recommend making a check list of this post and and paste it on any wall in your room or kitchen and read it often to remember.