Wonserful definitions

CIGARETTE:

A pinch of tobacco

rolled in paper

with fire at one end

and a fool at the other! 



MARRIAGE:

It’s an agreement

wherein

a man loses his bachelor degree

and a woman gains her master



LECTURE:

An art of transmitting Information

from the notes of the lecturer

to the notes of students

without passing through the minds

of either



CONFERENCE:

The confusion of one man

multiplied by the

number present



COMPROMISE:

The art of dividing

a cake in such a way that

everybody believes

he got the biggest piece



TEARS:

The hydraulic force by which

masculine will power is

defeated by feminine water-power!



DICTIONARY:

A place where divorce comes

before marriage



CONFERENCE ROOM:

A place where everybody talks,

nobody listens

and everybody disagrees later on



ECSTASY:

A feeling when you feel

you are going to feel

a feeling

you have never felt before



cl-assIC:

A book

which people praise,

but never read



SMILE:

A curve

that can set

a lot of things straight!



OFFICE:

A place

where you can relax

after your strenuous

home life



YAWN:

The only time

when some married men

ever get to open

their mouth



ETC:

A sign

to make others believe

that you know

more than

you actually do



COMMITTEE:

Individuals

who can do

nothing individually

and sit to decide

that nothing can be done

together



EXPERIENCE:

The name

men give

to their

Mistakes



ATOM BOMB:

An invention

to bring an end

to all

inventions



PHILOSOPHER:

A fool

who torments himself

during life,

to be spoken of

when dead



DIPLOMAT:

A person

who tells you

to go to hell

in such a way

that you actually look forward

to the trip



OPPORTUNIST:

A person

who starts taking bath

if he

accidentally falls

into a river



OPTIMIST:

A person

who while falling

from EIFFEL TOWER

says in midway

“SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!”



PESSIMIST: 

A person

who says that

O is the last letter

in ZERO,

Instead of the first letter

in OPPORTUNITY



MISER:

A person

who lives poor

so that

he can die RICH!



FATHER:

A banker

provided by

nature



CRIMINAL:

A guy

no different

from the other,

unless he gets caught



BOSS:

Someone

who is early

when you are late

and late

when you are early



POLITICIAN:

One who

shakes your hand

before elections

and your Confidence

Later 



DOCTOR:

A person

who kills

your ills

by pills,

and kills you

by his bills..!!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s