How to Get Along with People You Dont Like‏

Here is a simple but powerful and transformative  that is, intense  experience for you, in two steps.

For the first step, on computer, paper, or at least in your mind, make a list of the people you don’t like who you routinely correspond with or who impact your life.

This can include those in your professional and personal world, and those in the public eye, who rub you the wrong way, who make your skin crawl, or who — if you didnt believe in kindness and compassion or at least in avoiding jail — youd flat out enjoy punching in the nose.

Surely a few people spring right to mind.

Create this list of people you dont like, and then consider each person on it in this regard:

What is it about this person that is worth emulating?

Instead of focusing on their disagreeable qualities and actions, that is, for each person on your list shift your perspective to what their best qualities are  more particularly, to the one, two or more aspects of their character that YOU could learn from and perhaps use more of.

Perseverance? Discipline? A happy-go-lucky attitude?

Everyone has something worth emulating. Everyone. Though certain people may deserve to be fired, jailed, or impeached, even they have qualities that are worth appreciating and emulating.

It is our reactionary egos that are prone to completely trash those who seem to have a negative influence in some way on us. Our egos are primitive; if somebody strokes them, that somebody is good, and if somebody kicks them, that somebody is bad.

This lingering reaction creates the notion of  dislike, or hate, which blocks our eyes, mind and heart from focusing on anything but the negative. But by focusing on the negative in anyone  I really dont like that person — we are doing by far the most damage to ourselves.

Honing in on what we dont like in people (or in situations for that matter) wont change them, but it does make our lives considerably less peaceful and sucks away from our productivity and happiness. It becomes a habit that perpetuates the self-damage. Plus it makes us considerably less attractive to others.

This is not a call to tolerate being taken advantage of or abused by people we dont like, of course; if changes need to occur to avoid those circumstances then by all means do what is ethical to make those changes.

But it IS a call not to let those people  really, your own ego  pull you down into discord and disharmony where you dont deserve to be.

The key, then, is to try to focus on what is worth appreciating and emulating in the less-than-your-favorite-people people  even if (especially if) they are your opponent, such as in or on court  versus letting your ego, your emotional reactions, rule.

So the first step is to get your practice by making that list of people you dont like and considering each person from that angle.

And then the second step is to extend that practice to daily life.

The next time you encounter someone who seems to be doing the opposite of their part to make your life fabulous — in person, on T.V., in your head — instead of focusing on what makes them such a lousy human being, focus on what it is about this person that is worth emulating. Keep striving to do this until, typically two to three weeks in, it becomes a habit you dont even need to think about.

You will be quite surprised at how this shift in your perspective reduces your overall anxiety and enables you to achieve more … and achieve it happily.

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First Things First:‏

We all have many things on our list to do and there doesn’t seem to be enough time and energy to get it all done. Prioritizing is a way to solve this frustrating problem. Prioritizing is about making choices. Here are ideas to help you prioritize.

1. To prioritize effectively, you need to be able to recognize what is important. The important (high priority) tasks are based on what you value and those that help you achieve your goals and provide meaningful and rewarding long-term results. As you perform different tasks, think about where they fit on your priority list.

2. Making a list of all the tasks that need to be done is a good way to begin prioritizing. Prioritize the items on the list by using the ABC method to rank your priorities. For example, Priority A: Must Do (crucial tasks and commitments to do today), Priority B: Should Do (important things that do not need to be done today), and Priority C: Nice to Do (least urgent tasks).

3. Do not think of your priorities as just jobs that need to be done. As you remind yourself to direct yourself to the most important tasks first, you will find yourself letting go of tasks that really didn’t need to be done at that time. For example, what’s more important? Helping your child with homework or getting a load of laundry done?

4. Also take note of the difference between tasks that you NEED to do and those that you WANT to do. Deciding the order in which you prioritize tasks means you start with the needs first and move to the wants afterwards.

5. It has been said before, but learning to say ‘no’ is important. Try focusing on the important things that will get done because you used that little word to decline a task that was not a part of your priorities. What are some of the things you should say ‘no’ to?

6. Interruptions are a normal part of life. If you deal with a lot of interruptions in your life, this can put a damper on your priorities. Learn to limit the number of interruptions in your life.

7. Delegating tasks to someone else is a way to free up some of your time for the jobs that are important for you. It may be tempting to take over if the work is not being done quite to your liking. However, you have to learn that done doesn’t have to be perfect. Good enough is often just fine–like allowing your child to fold the laundry, even if it’s not perfect.

8. Work on overcoming procrastination. Procrastination can waste a lot of valuable time that could have been used for working on your priorities. When you catch yourself procrastinating, be sure to make the effort to take that first step toward completing the task at hand. Taking that first step will help get the ball rolling toward completion.

9. When you prioritize unplanned activities, keep in mind your goals and rely on your instincts. Your effectiveness in prioritizing in these situations depends on the clarity of your goals.

10. When prioritizing, you need to be able to separate the tasks that need doing from the busy work that tends to eat away at your time. Many tasks that fill up your day may not need doing at all or could be done less frequently. Determine what that busy work is in your career and your life.

11. Priorities change as life changes. Revisit and update your priorities on a regular basis.

12. Keep in mind that everything in your life cannot be a priority. There are many important things that will compete for attention over your lifetime and that there are not enough hours in that lifetime to give attention to everything that is good and worthwhile. You have to be selective.

13. Develop systems to help keep things running smoothly. Many times that can be accomplished by using a personal calendar. In family settings, a master calendar is helpful.

14. Keep the option of ‘buying time’ in mind. If you have an extremely hectic schedule, it may be reasonable to buy time by selecting goods and services that save you from investing time. For example, paying a neighbor to mow your lawn is one way of buying time. What are other ways you can buy some time?

15. Use technology to help you prioritize tasks. Sometimes an important task can be done more quickly with the use of technology. Instead of meeting an appointment in person, can you do it through a conference call or by e-mail?

16. When prioritizing, make sure to include deadlines for each task. It will make tasks easier to prioritize and give you more focus.

17. Last, but certainly not least, you also need to be one of the priorities you set for yourself. It is important to take care of you and make time for yourself.

How to Get Rid of Pimples.‏

An oily face is a matter of concern not only for teenagers and young adults, but also for those people who are in the pre-menopausal phase of their life.

Oily skin and its related consequences such as acne and pimples can be quite embarrassing for the affected person and the ugly scars and blemishes on the skin can even lower the person’s self-esteem.

The sebaceous glands are over active. Skin that feels great when you take off for work in the morning but feels greasy by lunch; these are all too familiar scenarios for those of us with oily skin.

As your skin is oily, which is more prone to pimples, treatment for both pimples and oily skin should be done simultaneously for best results.

Eat Fewer Oily Foods

Your skin already is producing an abundance of oils, so it is best to avoid fats, fried foods and anything that will make your already sensitive skin more prone to flare ups.

Drink More Water

Water assists your body in flushing out toxins from your system, and well hydrated skin is healthy skin. Drinking more water and few glasses of soda, coffee, and alcohol has many health benefits for the rest of your body too.

Mint Masks

Try wearing a mask of crushed fresh mint leaves. Mint contains menthol which is a natural pain reliever. Crush the mint leaves into a thick paste and spread evenly over the skin. Leave on for ten minutes and then rinse with cool water. The menthol in the mask will also work to relieve the inflammation around the acne making the appearance less noticeable.

Lemon and Rosewater Astringent

Mix equal parts of rosewater and lemon juice to make an astringent solution. Astringents, while they sting a bit when applied, tend to dry the excess oils on the surface of the skin and help to heal pimples. Leave the mixture on your face for 15-30 minutes and then rinse with cool water. Lemon juice is a natural acid, so be careful to keep this mixture away from your eyes.

Cucumber and Oatmeal Masks

Cucumber and oatmeal masks tend to have a soothing natural exfoliating property that helps to gently cleanse the pores and lift excess oils off the surface of the skin. To make the mask, puree ‘¼ of a cucumber and set aside. Prepare one serving of oatmeal as directed and mix in 3 Tablespoons of honey. Mix in the cucumber and set aside to cool. Wash your face with mild soap and pat dry. When the mixture is cool, apply evenly to your face and allow it to sit on your face for 20 minutes. Rinse with cool water and pat dry.

Orange Peels and Water

A paste of crushed orange peels mixed along with water can be applied to your oily face and can be rinsed off with luke warm water after 20 to 30 minutes for effective pimples treatment.