Wanna be slim… Fun and Jokes

One fat guy – goes to a popular GYM in Bangalore sees an ad for a new gym guaranteeing to reduce anyone’s weight by 5, 10 or 20 kilograms on the first day. So he goes and tells them he wants to lose 5 kg.

They lead him into a huge gym with all kinds of ropes and parallel bars and ladders and tell him to wait a minute. He’s standing there when on the far side of the gym a door opens and out steps a beautiful girl, with a sign saying “If you catch me, I’m yours.”

He starts running, and just as he gets close, she starts picking up speed. Before he knows it, he’s running all over the gym, up the ladders, down the ladders, across the parallel bars, here and there. And just as he’s about to catch the blonde, pop, she disappears through a door. In comes the management who lead him to the showers, and then weigh him. Sure enough, he lost exactly 5 kg.

He’s back on the street and starts to think. “Jesus, I was so close to catching her. If I had a little more time…”

So he races back to the gym and says, “I want to lose 20 more kg.”

“No problem,” says the manager.

Again he is led to the large gym. This time he’s standing by the door when it opens.

Out comes a Gorilla with a sign. “If I catch you, you’re mine.”

When Opportunity knocks…. MAKE USE OF IT !

A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands their money.

Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, ‘Did you see me rob this bank?’

The man replied, ‘Yes sir, I did.’
The robber then shot him in the temple , killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, ‘Did you see me rob this bank?’
 
The man replied, ‘No sir, I didn’t, but my wife did!’
 
Moral – When Opportunity knocks…. MAKE USE OF IT !

Machine that catches thieves

 

Please do not laugh!

In U.S. they invented a machine that catches thieves; they took it out
to different countries for a test.

 
In U.S.A, in 30 minutes, it caught 20 thieves;

 
In UK , in 30 minutes it
caught 50 thieves;

 
Spain , in 30 minutes it caught 65 thieves;

 
Ghana ,
in 30 minutes it caught 600 thieves;

 
India , in 15 minutes the machine
was stolen.

 
I thought I told you not to laugh????????

Have a laughing day,

won’t you!!
  

Hats off to parents – Real Story

Chennai : 25th Sep 2008

Chennai : 25th Sep 2008

 

1st photo : Jithenthran…2nd photo is his father and mother…3rd photo: The doctor didn’t even remove the face mask and head cover and coming running right from the operation theatre

 

The thing is…. there is a family. Parents are doctors…and they had a son named jithenthran.

 

On 09/24/2008, he took his father’s bike for seeing his friend and while return he met with an accident.

 

The people who are there know him and admitted him at chengelpattu hospital. Then they informed his parents and they took him to Teynampet Apollo hospital.

There the doctors examined him and said that his brain has lost all his senses and there is no way to give him life. Without controlling the sadness the parents understood the fact and they decided to donate his organs to the people.

 

First, his eyes were given to Sankara nethralaya, then his kidney was given to Apollo hospital for transplantation and at last here comes the final ever heard miracle. They decided to give his heart to a 6 year old boy who needs it. So they verified and at last found that the boy is struggling for life at Cherians heart foundation, Chennai.

 

But within 30mins that heart should be transplanted; They need to go 20kms and in Chennai traffic and doubted whether it will happen. Then the doctors called traffic police and asked their help and they prepared the ambulance with A/C. So fast they removed the heart from their son and kept in an ice box and run towards the ambulance.

 

When they came out the boy’s father saw that ice box and cried like anything. The doctor who carried the box ran like anything that he didn’t even see the ambulance which is waiting outside and he entered the police car which was waiting. He said to the person to just go to Cherian hospital soon. The person who was standing near the car was the Assistant Commissioner and he without seeing his status and jumped to drivers seat and drove the car with full speed.

 

Every signal traffic got alert and left way for this car and at last within 15mins the heart was given to the doctors in Cherian hospital and it was transplanted to the small boy. Really heart touching….

 

Do u know the meaning of the name of the boy who died….

 

His name is Jithenthran – a person who will steal other’s heart…………..Yes , now he has stole everyone’s heart…..

 

Really … hats off to the parents … 

 

Short and funny story

Ramya was about to leave office after finishing her work. She got a call from her husband Karthi,

RAMYA(R): “Hello, yes Karthi”.

KARTHI(K): “Ramya, can you open my gmail and get a print out of the mail from that USconsultant I forgot to take it in my office”

(R): “Yes, I can, I need your password”
(K): “jeni22091980”
(R): “Ok fine”

She takes the print out and logs out. Some thought struck her mind now.
JENI happens to be his college mate. Hmmm…

She decides not to discuss this with Karthi. She simply opens her mail box and changes the password from “mohan143” to “karthiramya” and leaves for home!

MORAL OF THE STORY: Change your password! NOW!

8 Fat Fighting Foods

Almonds
Almond joy! Dieters who ate 3 ounces of these nuts every day reduced their weight and body-mass index by a solid 18 percent compared with an 11 percent drop in the no-nut group, a study in the International Journal of Obesity found. Almonds are high in alpha-linolenic acid, which can speed the metabolism of fats. Stick to 12 per serving.

Berries
Vitamin C–loaded fruit such as strawberries and raspberries can help you sizzle up to 30 percent more fat during exercise, suggests research from Arizona State University at Mesa. Blend a vinaigrette of 1 cup berries and ¼ cup balsamic vinegar.

Cinnamon
This spice could make your waistline nice. Sprinkling ¼ teaspoon on your food may prevent a postmeal insulin spike—this increase normally occurs after you eat and “signals the body that it should store fat rather than burn it,” explains Lauren Slayton, R.D., of New York City. Add a dash to your oatmeal, yogurt or coffee.

Mustard
Hello, yellow. The spice that gives mustard its color, turmeric, may slow the growth of fat tissues, a study in the journal Endocrinology notes. Eighty-six mayo in favor of any mustard; sprinkle turmeric on cauliflower and roast for a tangy side.

Oranges
Prevent pound creep with this citrus star: It contains fat-torching compounds called flavones. Women who ate the most flavones had a significantly lower increase in body fat over a 14-year period, a study in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition finds. Snack on slices or drink freshly squeezed OJ (with pulp!) for the biggest payback.

Soybeans
These green gems are rich in choline, a compound that blocks fat absorption and breaks down fatty deposits. Add ½ cup edamame to a salad.

Sweet potatoes
Trade up to sweet taters. They’re high in fiber, which means no drastic insulin jumps and thus less fat packed onto your hips. Bake a small sweet potato—think of two bars of soap as a portion size—and top with a dollop of lowfat or nonfat cottage cheese.

Swiss cheese
Holy cow: “Calcium-rich foods reduce fat-producing enzymes and increase fat breakdown,” says Michael B. Zemel, Ph.D., director of the Nutrition Institute at the University of Tennessee at Knoxville. Put toe to toe with some of its cheesy counterparts, Swiss is a heavy hitter in the calcium department; layer a slice on a lunchtime sandwich, or stack some on high-fiber crackers.

Blondin (Jean-Francois Gravlet) crossing Niagara falls – Real Inspiring Story

In the 1800s, an acrobat named Blondin (Jean-Francois Gravlet) became famous for crossing Niagara Falls by tightrope many times, usually with no safety net.

One day a crowd gathered at the falls to watch his most dangerous attempt yet. He planned to push a wheelbarrow loaded with a heavy sack of cement across the tightrope.
With that extra weight, the slightest miscalculation could tip the wheelbarrow and twist him off the wire, plunging him to death 160 feet below in the raging waters.

Thousands watched breathlessly as he made his way across, placing one foot carefully in front of the other, quietly pushing the wheelbarrow across the spray-filled chasm, oblivious to the roar of the water beneath him.

When he made it to the other side, the throng let out its collective breath and cheered. What a feat!
After his crossing, Blondin challenged a nearby reporter: “Do you believe I can do anything on a tightrope?”

“Oh yes, Mr. Blondin,” said the reporter, “after what I’ve seen today, I believe it. You can do anything.”

“Do you believe, then,” said Blondin, “that instead of a sack of cement, I could put a man in this wheelbarrow—a man who has never been on a tightrope before–and wheel him, without a net, safely over to the other side?”

“Oh yes sir, Mr. Blondin,” said the reporter, “I believe it.”

“Good,” said Blondin. “Get in.”

The reporter paled and quickly disappeared into the crowd.

It’s one thing to believe something, but quite another to have that kind of faith in someone.

However, one person that day did have that kind of faith in Blondin. This brave volunteer agreed to get into the wheelbarrow and cross the falls with the master acrobat.

As Blondin tipped out the bag of cement and placed his passenger in the barrow, men on both sides of the falls quickly placed bets on the outcome.

Then as the crowd cheered, Blondin made his way back across the falls, this time pushing a nervous passenger ahead of him.

It looked like another easy conquest for the daredevil. But when they were halfway across the 1,600-foot rope, a man with a heavy bet against them crept over and cut one of the guy wires.

Suddenly, the tightrope pitched crazily back and forth, the force of the whipping motion gaining in intensity. As Blondin fought to keep his balance, he knew that they were seconds away from death.

As Blondin tipped out the bag of cement and placed his passenger in the barrow, men on both sides of the falls quickly placed bets on the outcome.

Then as the crowd cheered, Blondin made his way back across the falls, this time pushing a nervous passenger ahead of him.

It looked like another easy conquest for the daredevil. But when they were halfway across the 1,600-foot rope, a man with a heavy bet against them crept over and cut one of the guy wires.

Suddenly, the tightrope pitched crazily back and forth, the force of the whipping motion gaining in intensity. As Blondin fought to keep his balance, he knew that they were seconds away from death.

When the rim of the wheelbarrow came off the wire, they would both be pitched headlong into the churning waters.

Blondin spoke, cutting through the terror of his passenger in the wheelbarrow.

“Stand up!” he commanded.
“Stand up and grab my shoulders!”

The man sat there paralyzed.

“Let go and stand up!
Let go of the wheelbarrow!
Do it or die!”

Somehow the man managed to stand up  and step out of the swaying wheelbarrow.

“Your arms … put them round my neck!
Now, your legs … round my waist!”
said Blondin.

Again the man obeyed, clinging to Blondin. The empty wheelbarrow fell, disappearing into the frothy turmoil far below. The aerialist stood there, using all his years of experience and every trained muscle to stay on the wire until the pitching subsided a little.

Then inch by inch, he made his way across, carrying the man like a child. Finally, he deposited him on the other side.