March 4, 2010 by vidyadaan
Self confidence gives us the freedom to commit mistakes and cope with failure without making us feel worthless. If only we have confidence in ourselves, can we gain confidence of others. After all, most people are reluctant to back a project thats being pitched by someone who is nervous, fumbling and overly apologetic. On the other hand, you might be persuaded by someone who spoke clearly, who held his or her head high, who answered questions assuredly, and who readily admitted when he/she did not know something.
So where do you rate yourself on the scale of 1-10 for your confidence level? Do you think you fall in the low confidence bracket? Here is some good news for you. And the good news is that self-confidence can be learned and built on.
Lets start the process of building self-confidence. Remember there is no quick fix solution for it. Nonetheless, practice makes a man perfect. So all you have to do is try and implement the following given tips in your day to day life.
Recognize your insecurities: We all have insecurities in life. It can be anything from acne, to regrets, to friends at school. Giving a name to the things which make you feel unworthy, ashamed or inferior helps to combat them. You can try to pen down your thoughts and you will find that it makes you feel much lighter and happier. Remember that no one is perfect. The man or woman sitting next to you might have the same amount of insecurities as you have. If writing doesnt come easily to you, you might want to talk it out with your friends or loved ones. Sharing your thoughts will help relieve the burden you have been carrying all alone.
Identify your successes: No matter how insecure you might feel, God has blessed each one of us with some talent. Discover the things you are good at and then focus on improving them. Give yourself permission to take pride in your talents. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which youve declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.
Be thankful for what you have: A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether its emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.
Be positive: Avoid self-pity or sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others.
Dress sharp: Although clothes don’t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. When you dont look good, you dont feel good. It changes the way you carry yourself and interact with people. This doesn’tt mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes.
Walk faster: Your gait tells a lot about your personality. Is it slow? Tired? Painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. You can increase yourself confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.
Compliment other people: When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, youll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.
Take the front seat: Back benchers might seem to have a lot of fun in schools and colleges but that does nothing to boost their self confidence. Don’t be afraid to get noticed. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over your irrational fear of getting noticed and build your self confidence.
Speak up: Its a general observation that many people are afraid to speak or ask questions in a group discussion or a public gathering. They are afraid that they might be judged for saying something stupid. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.
Work out: A healthy mind resides in a healthy body. If you are fit, you are surrounded by positivity and energy. If you are out of shape you feel unattractive. This leads to demoralization. Just a little discipline in your life can help shape up your self confidence in a big way.
Smile: Last but not the least; try to smile as much as possible. People are always appreciative of a smiling face. You will be welcomed by anyone who comes in your contact. A smiling face is always received with warmth and affection. Acceptance and recognition from others helps in building self confidence.
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March 4, 2010 by vidyadaan
Sometimes work can be a drag. You get caught up in trying to be more productive and suddenly your life turns into a series of to-do lists. You gauge your measure of success by how much you accomplish. You even determine how happy you allow yourself to be by how much youve gotten done in the day.
We spend a lot of time trying to find ways to be more productive. To do things faster, better, cheaper and spend our time more effectively. But instead of just doing more in less time, maybe we should focus on actually enjoying the work were doing instead.
Here are 8 ways to make work seem like less of a chore and more like a gift:
- Follow your natural rhythms. A lot of the time I resent working is because Im trying to force myself to do something I dont feel like doing. Naturally there will always be some things youre not crazy about doing (like cleaning the toilet). But how often do you force yourself to work more, when you really want to relax? When you force yourself to work when youve promised yourself a break, youll likely just end up distracting yourself with other things and put off working. Then you get stressed and end up resenting work. Instead, follow your natural rhythms. When you feel like working, work. When you dont, dont. Dont over complicate things.
- Do, don’t think. Im going to stay true to this point and not think about writing something elaborate. Just do, stop thinking about it. Fail, make corrections later.
- Don’t put sugar in your tank. You wouldnt put sugar in your gas tank right? It doesnt make much sense to fill your body up with unhealthy fuel either. If you dont have the energy to get the work you need to done, work will feel forced.
- Remove hidden roadblocks. Whats making you avoid working? Whats making your work seem like drudgery rather than joyful? It might have something to do with your beliefs about yourself. Maybe you believe youre not good enough, smart enough or dont have enough experience. Question your beliefs about what you can and cant do.
- Only do your best. Work can easily become a chore when youre trying to constantly be perfect. The truth is, some of your ideas might not be so great. Others will be mind blowing. If you can accept that and just do your best, you stop judging yourself. Guess what it feels like when youre no longer picking over everything you do with a fine toothed comb? It feels extremely liberating. It feels like you can actually enjoy your experience, rather than worrying about how everything is going to turn out. That is working effortlessly.
- Act from your gut. When you think you have a great idea, believe it. Follow it. Chase it until youre out of breath and can barely hold yourself up. Because if you dont trust yourself, youll regret it later. The best way to live is to follow your intuition and trust life. If nothing else, trust yourself. Because if you cant trust yourself, how can you trust your mistrust? Thats not very smart is it?
- Focus on what matters. Our minds are constantly pulling us in different directions. We have to wash the cat, buy more apple cinnamon oatmeal, finish writing that resignation letter to your no-longer-boss at your dead-end job, and all sorts of other things. We have a tendency to follow whats urgent instead of whats important. In order to get the important things done, we have to be ruthless at removing distractions. If it takes bringing a laptop (or notepad) to a cafe to write your grandiose novel, then do that. Avoid the vacuum of minutiae urgency. Remove all distractions so you can focus on the important things. I would much rather spend 4 hours working on an important project, then 4 hours spinning my wheels and scratching my head trying to figure out what I did today.
- Refuse to do what you dont want to do. I often avoid working because Im trying to do things I think I should do. I think I should read more because it will make me smarter. I think I should buy new clothes because it will make me cooler. I think I should work on this project because it will be good for my resume. Forget what you think you should do (except maybe paying your rent). Do what you want to do. Other people will understand. In fact, theyll probably envy you.
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March 4, 2010 by vidyadaan
You know you need to work out, but youre having trouble getting up the enthusiasm. How do you find motivation to exercise when you just dont feel like getting off your butt? I ask myself this question every now and then, and I have the feeling Im not the only one.
There are a million ways to motivate yourself to exercise, actually, but these are a few that have worked for me.
- Have fun. If you hate running, dont go to the track for exercise. Find something you like. The list of different kinds of exercises are nearly endless. The only really important thing is to get your body moving and your heart rate up.
- How you feel after a workout. I always feel great after a good workout. Its a high. And I let that motivate me the next time.
- Calories burned. If you count calories (and its really one of the most effective ways to lose weight), you know that the more you exercise, the more calories you burn — and the bigger your calorie deficit.
- How youre going to look. Imagine a slimmer, fitter you. Now let that visualization drive you.
- Change it up. Even if you have a routine you enjoy, mix it up from time to time. Try entirely different exercises. You can check out a tape at the library and try yoga or kick boxing for an afternoon. This will not only keep you interested, it will break your muscles out of their routine and help produce better results.
- Get a buddy. Exercising with a friend introduces a positive kind of peer pressure. You will be more likely to go to the gym if you know someone is waiting there for you. Talking and laughing while exercising will also keep you from being bored.
- An exercise log/graph. For some reason, writing it down is extremely important. Really. Do it for a week and youll see what I mean.
- Get appropriate clothing. If you dont have the appropriate clothes for the exercise, it can be irritating, uncomfortable, frustrating, or even unsafe. If you exercise outside after dusk, be sure you have reflective clothing to prevent traffic accidents. Also be sure the clothing looks nice; if you dont like the way your clothing looks, you may feel uncomfortable, and less likely to exercise.
- Pack Ahead of Time: An iPod, athletic shoes, a towel whatever. Walking around the house trying to find stuff is a good time to lose your resolve. Put everything together in your gym bag. When you finish working out, take out things that need to be laundered and replace them immediately.
- Have a Goal. What do you want to achieve? Make it specific, make it meaningful, make it obtainable. Be sure to have short-term benchmarks along the way. Its OK to change your goals if the original plan doesnt work, but have a goal. Regularly evaluate how you are doing on your goals.
- Success stories. I find the success stories of others incredibly inspirational. If a fitness website has success stories, Ill almost always read them.
- Reward Yourself. Have a healthy reward when you reach a goal. Buy yourself that cute pair of bike shorts. Go for a weekend hiking tri. Soak in the sauna for your workout that day. Buy a new yoga video. Whatever works for you to celebrate in line with your healthy lifestyle!
Posted in Health and Fitness | Leave a Comment »
February 7, 2010 by mrajimba
A disciple and his teacher were walking through the forest. The disciple was disturbed by the fact that his mind was in constant unrest.
He asked his teacher: “Why most people’s minds are restless, and only a few possess a calm mind? What can one do to still the mind?”
The teacher looked at the disciple, smiled and said:
“I will tell you a story. An elephant was standing and picking leaves from a tree. A small fly came, flying and buzzing near his ear. The elephant waved it away with his long ears. Then the fly came again, and the elephant waved it away once more”.
This was repeated several times. Then the elephant asked the fly:
“Why are you so restless and noisy? Why can’t you stay for a while in one place?”
The fly answered: “I am attracted to whatever I see, hear or smell. My five senses pull me constantly in all directions and I cannot resist them. What is your secret? How can you stay so calm and still?”
The elephant stopped eating and said:
“My five senses do not rule my attention. Whatever I do, I get immersed in it. Now that I am eating, I am completely immersed in eating. In this way I can enjoy my food and chew it better. I rule and control my attention, and not the other way around.”
Upon hearing these words, the disciple’s eyes opened wide and a smile appeared on his face. He looked at his teacher and said:
“I understand! If my five senses are in control of my mind and attention, then my mind is in constant unrest. If I am in charge of my five senses and attention, then my mind becomes calm”.
“Yes, that’s right”, answered the teacher, ” The mind is restless and goes wherever the attention is. Control your attention, and you control your mind”.
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February 6, 2010 by vidyadaan
A kindergarten teacher has decided to let her class play a game.
The teacher told each child in the class to bring along a plastic bag containing a few potatoes. Each potato will be given a name of a person that the child hates, so the number of potatoes that a child will put in his/her plastic bag will depend on the number of people he/she hates.
So when the day came, every child brought some potatoes with the name of the people he/she hated. Some had 2 potatoes; some 3 while some up to 5 potatoes. The teacher then told the children to carry with them the potatoes in the plastic bag wherever they go (even to the toilet) for 1 week.
Days after days passed by, and the children started to complain due to the unpleasant smell let out by the rotten potatoes. Besides, those having 5 potatoes also had to carry heavier bags. After 1 week, the children were relieved because the game had finally ended….
The teacher asked: “How did you feel while carrying the potatoes with you for 1 week?”. The children let out their frustrations and started complaining of the trouble that they had to go through having to carry the heavy and smelly potatoes wherever they go.
Then the teacher told them the hidden meaning behind the game. The teacher said: “This is exactly the situation when you carry your hatred for somebody inside your heart. The stench of hatred will contaminate your heart and you will carry it with you wherever you go. If you cannot tolerate the smell of rotten potatoes for just 1 week, can you imagine what is it like to have the stench of hatred in your heart for your lifetime???”
Moral of the Story:
Throw away any hatred for anyone from your heart so that you will not carry sins for a lifetime.
Forgiving others is the best attitude to take!
True love is not loving a perfect person
but loving an imperfect person perfectly!!
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January 23, 2010 by mrajimba
In a small town, a person decided to open up a brothel, which was right opposite to a church. The church and its congregation started a campaign to block the brothel from opening with petitions and prayed daily against his business.
Work progressed. However, when it was almost complete and was about to open a few days later, a strong lightning struck the brothel and it was burnt to the ground.
The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, till the brothel owner sued the church authorities on the grounds that the church through its congregation and prayers was ultimately responsible for the destruction of his brothel, either through direct or indirect actions or means.
In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection that their prayers were reasons for the act of God.
As the case made its way into court, the judge looked over the paperwork at the hearing and commented:
‘I don’t know how I’m going to decide this case, but it appears from the paperwork, we have a brothel owner who believes in the power of prayer and we have an entire church that doesn’t.’
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January 20, 2010 by mrajimba
Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House in Washington D.C. One from Bangladesh , another from India and the third, from China.
They go with a White House office to examine the fence.
The Bangladesh contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. “Well”, he says, “I figure the job will run about $900. ($400 for materials, $400 for my team and $100 profit for me)”.
The Chinese contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, “I can do this job for $700. ($300 for materials, $300 for my team and $100 profit for me)”.
The Indian contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, “$2,700.”
The official, outraged says, “You didn’t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?”
The Indian contractor whispers back, “$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from China to fix the fence.”
“Done!” replies the government official.
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January 19, 2010 by vidyadaan
A worried woman went to her Doctor and said :
‘Doctor, I have a serious problem and desperately need your help! My baby is not even 1 yr. old and I’m pregnant again. I don’t want kids so close together.’
So the doctor said: ‘Ok, and what do you want me to do?’
She said: ‘I want you to perform an abortion, and I’m counting on your help with this.’
The doctor thought for a little, and after some silence he said to the lady: ’I think I have a better solution for your problem. It’s less dangerous for you too.’
She smiled, thinking that the doctor was going to accept her request.
Then he continued: ‘You see, in order for you not to have to take care of 2 babies at the same time, let’s kill the one in your arms. This way, you could rest some before the other one is born. If we’re going to kill one of them, it doesn’t matter which one it is. There would be no risk for your body if you chose the one in your arms.
The lady was horrified and said: ‘No doctor! How terrible! It’s a crime to kill a child!
‘I agree’, the doctor replied. ‘But you seemed to be ok with it, so I thought maybe that was the best solution. The doctor smiled, realizing that he had made his point.
He convinced the mom that there is no difference in killing a child that’s already been born and one that’s still in the womb. The crime is the same!
Abortion Doctors have murdered over 48 million real American people (babies) since 1973.
There are 4000 babies aborted each day in America.
One every 20 seconds.
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